Kiss of the Basilisk Series: Split or Swallow #1
on February 25, 2025
Genres: fantasy, romantasy
Pages: 528

Twenty year old Temperance Verus has never been kissed. But that's what the basilisk is for.

Along with thirteen other contestants, Tem must train with a basilisk to learn the power of seduction and win the prince's hand in marriage. When Tem is matched with Caspen, the Serpent King, she realizes she might actually stand a chance. But with tensions rising between the basilisks and the humans, Tem is suddenly torn in two directions. As her bond with Caspen deepens, so does her connection with the prince. And when she uncovers a terrible secret about the royal family, Tem finds herself caught between two neither of which she can survive without.

Look, I like an unhinged book. There’s not a lot of trigger warnings that put me off (I don’t even usually read them, but that’s a me thing and definitely isn’t advised if it makes you uncomfortable). Give me the dark villains, questionable but steamy sex, why-choose or mutli-love interests. Heck, sure, give me an erotic snake tongue (something I never thought I’d say and will not repeat, thank you).

What I don’t want is insta-love on all fronts when literally any relationship building beyond sex happens off page. ESPECIALLY when one of these insta-love men withholds so much information from the FMC and it basically becomes the thread of their relationship. I can’t even be mad at him, though, because each time he DOES share something important with her, she turned it back on him and got mad at him anyway. At one point he explains a ritual that is being requested of her (after he refuses to tell her because he doesn’t want her to go through with it), she calls it barbaric and can’t believe he’d expect her to do it, and he says he doesn’t expect her to, that’s why he didn’t tell her. And she follows up by saying, and I quote, “Why not? Do you think I’m incapable?” Kindly fuck off, Tem.

What I don’t want is a FMC who is ostracized by her village and has self-esteem issues, but then has sex and is magically self-assured. Oh, wait no, on this page she’s back to believing everything the villagers say. Oh, no hang on, she’s self-assured again. Wait wait…I don’t even know what’s going on anymore. Tem’s characterization seemed to change scene to scene, and it was very annoying. It was as if her characterizations worked around the scene instead of the scene working around her characterization.

What I don’t want is an explanation of a village who’s big tradition is sending girls off to these magic sex basilisks, but somehow the FMC doesn’t know the vocabulary for her own anatomy. This bugged me a LOT, because the world building for this could have been so well-done. They would have known from birth that these girls would be vying to become the prince’s wife via sex basilisk, why wouldn’t you give them proper prep ahead of time?? Even if they weren’t allowed to engage in pleasurable activities until meeting the basilisks, giving them a proper education on what the heck is going on would do wonders.

Leo and Gabriel are the only ones I cared about. Leo deserves so much more than whatever is going on between these pages. He was patient, understanding, let Tem take the lead on the courtship even though this WHOLE thing is about him choosing a wife. And Gabriel deserved to be so much more than a side character just popping up to offer emotional support and a quick joke. I need these two to have their own adventures.

Anyway, I skimmed about 40% of the book because I just could not stand the characters or the writing. The claw didn’t bother me (although I have so many unanswered questions), the ritual itself didn’t bother me (please don’t unpack this), and overall I could have handled so much more unhinged behaviour. I want so much more from this book.

Unfortunately it’ll probably stay on my shelf – I’m not one for sprayed edges normally, but these ones are so pretty.